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Finding Belonging? It starts in *your* head & heart ( Part 2: Inspiration )

We all long for a belonging in the world. To find family and our tribe, a soft place to land when life gets hard, a safe place to go home to at night. And yet, so many of us live in in our heads as women, and it's not exactly a safe place in there for us. We live with hearts and minds that are divided against ourselves, and worse, house a mean-girl critic who can make sure we never feel at home, where ever we are....

Wanna know how to change that? How to get your head and heart to be a more loving place? Read on to find out more.

An Elegant Woman holding flowers in a field during the Golden Hour of Sunset


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Happy Friday Friends! Welcome to back to the House of belonging & being at Home in the World!

That’s what we’re digging into this month and this week we are heading into the topic with some Inspiration.

If you didn’t catch the love note from last week where we talked about needing:

“ ... a home in the world, and inside of us where we don’t have earn love with perfection or strength. It's just given freely. Even when we are messy, beautiful, fierce, sweet, brave, angry, terrified and everything in between. ”

But for today I’d like to invite you to get inspired to find your own inner Home in the World. So if you're ready... Here we go!




What do you envision as the feeling of "Home"

when you think about it?

Now check out the funny video below & then scroll down...

Now, my guess is that is *NOT* what you envision when you think of what a home ideally should fee like.

Peace, joy, love, support, understanding, kindness and warmth, are probably more in line with what you would want in a home.

And yet… So many of us, as women live within our own heads, hearts and souls just like the example above.

We have inner critics and inner mean girls that fight with the other more confident parts of us. We have competing interests, like wanting to be a mom and a career woman, or wanting to be playful and wanting to be perfect.

Wanting more "me" time and wanting to be there for our families.. And those competing interests aren't just clamoring for attention in our heads, they are competing with each other, trying to outdo and top the other... Even making forceful grabs for power in our hearts, just like the couple above. That's hardly peace, let alone a Home within ourselves that can lead to us feeling at Home in the world. The truth is that belonging, starts with how we feel in our own skin, in our own head. If you don't have peace there? You won't find it anywhere else either. The warmth we are looking for in the world and in our own homes -- the love we are looking for, comes when we are able to make peace with paradox, and the contradictions within us, and imperfections, the flaws -- with being simply human. And I’d like to suggest that we become richer, more complex and more fascinating people when we do embrace those paradoxes within us… We also become more loving to those around us. So....

What does a house full of acceptance

and peace look like? What does a house the embraces all of us, even the contradictions, end up feeling like? Well I imagine it looks something like this...

Now it's your turn: What's been dividing your heart or mind? What have needed to make peace with, in yourself? What inside of you do you need to simply accept?

And how might accepting that contradiction or that "flaw" within you give you more belonging and love in your own heart? Think of some examples of people who are made more magnetic, more fascinating, and more loving because of their own paradox.

For instance, Marilyn Monroe wasn't just sexy. She was also very innocent and kittenish.

Liam Neeson doesn't just play tough guys willing to be ruthless. He plays fathers and husbands who are put in a tight situation because of their connection to their families who are often in danger.

And even Mother Theresa... Did you know she almost lost her Sainthood because she couldn't find her connection to her spirituality and to her religion for many, many lonely years after her first initial calling to her faith? Her faith and good works, weren't made less by her doubts, they are rendered even more miraculous and incredible.

Now, if other people can be made more by their contradiction, why is it that the same can't be said for you?

Is it possible that you might be more human, and more lovable and more admirable because of the wholeness of who you are (warts and all) than if you were merely one dimensional? Contradiction makes us more lovable and nuanced, and infinitely more likely to give others the same warmth, love and acceptance that we extend to ourselves. You don't need to weed out the parts of yourself that don't make sense, or forcefully overthrow that things about you don't like. You just need to accept that the price of being human is learning to live with contradiction.

And that's what I have for you this week... But...

Next Week… We’ll discover a fun Way to Play for Being at Home in the World


Next Week…

We'll discover a fun Way to play for Being at Home in the World!W Click here for Part 3 of Being At Home in the World


Desirée Sommer is a former Interior Designer & Writer dedicated to helping those around her to Beautify, Style & make their lives Fun again! She happily resides in the rural beauty of Idaho with her pet pooch Bree, where she gets to take epic hikes, and plot her next big travel escapade. Her favorite things include traveling, film & anything French or Italian. Oh, and dancing! Always dancing!


Are you ready to be inspired to find your next new direction?




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